WHAT IT IS AND HOW TO HAVE IT!
As our regular readers know, we at Educo.biz put a large emphasis on clear direct communication. In a world that is bent on consistently changing the meanings of words – WE DEFINE TERMS OFTEN….so that the reader may ‘understand’ what we are saying and educo is all about ‘understanding’ coming from ‘within’.
What is it to be content?
Is it to be ‘happy’?
Thats what most people will say. But I say it has nothing to do with being ‘happy’.
I like to define it as something like:
“the ability to accept difficult situations, trials and set backs without self induced emotional reaction like resentment frustration or similar”
New World Dictionary defines ‘content’ as “not desiring something more or different; satisfied“
What I am contending is that being ‘content’ is a choice, within your power, by practicing the discipline of ‘not reacting poorly’ to your external environment, for which you have no control.
12 steps calls it “to accept the things we cannot change…”
What are some examples you ask? Getting mad at yourself for forgetting something you really needed, getting frustrated at traffic, throwing a fit because the insurance company is screwing you over, the boss was rude, someone cut in line or cut you off, your ex spouse never showed to pick up the kid….are you getting my point?
When you stop reacting in anger, resentment and frustration to reality, no matter how small the matter, you will begin to experience real ‘contentment’. Stop getting angry over traffic, rude people, back stabbers, gossips, crap talkers, liars, thieves, government ineptitude, broken phones, apps that don’t work correctly and so on. Get it? When you allow yourself to react to daily occurrences you set yourself up to get ‘upset’ at the next slight or trial.
1. Practice showing gratitude daily and in person. Say “thank you” often. Give thanks to God or the Universe or your boss or partner. Actually name off all the things that you are grateful for in the last 2 weeks, from your eyesight to the food on your table – practice enjoying what you have!
2. Connect with people via small talk. You will be so surprised how much a small quaint friendly interaction will brighten your day and make it easy to forget about the losers or the losses in life.
3. Smile and make eye contact with people. Say “Good Morning” with life and gusto.
4. Practice deep breathing and meditation. Some of us have been reacting ‘poorly’ for a long time and have become accustomed to whining bitching and complaining about everything. It’s like national past time these days. Take up deep breathing for on the spot ‘grounding’ and to train yourself to ‘take control of your choices’ (i.e. become ‘active’ in lieu of being ‘reactive). Meditation and learning to ground yourself will heighten your awareness of your own ‘poor behavior’. It wont take it away, yet it will give you the greater inner strength by actually holding yourself accountable to your ‘higher self’ or the ‘self’ that knows that frustration will never get the traffic moving at a proper rate of speed – ha!
5. Forgive and let go. Learn to forgive others, especially in the small stuff. It’s not worth it. Do you realize how much of your life energy and your well being you are sacrificing by holding on to petty grudges and nitpicking. Knock it off! If someone cuts you off in traffic, smile and give him room versus riding his tailpipe. You will soon forget the trifle when you are not resentful or angry. Ever notice that?
6. Take someone out to coffee or lunch or buy dinner just for conversation and connecting. The point is do something different and fun while taking someone with you.
7. Learn to have fun daily, like a kid. Make that model or craft you’ve been talking about for the last 7 years. Do something sporadically fun for yourself. Take that cooking class or go target shooting – just do something fun light and easy.
8. Help someone out. You see someone out of gas or needs help carrying groceries to their car or just need directions – be that helpful caring person but don’t do it to feel good…do it because it’s the right thing to do.